Forks, The Lamest Spot on Earth

I read an article that got me worked up today. It seems that some idiot named Zig Gauthier is planning a new reality show. Ready for the concept? It's going to be based on the lives of the residents of the town of Forks, Washington. It will star the locals, from housewives, to the students of Forks High. We'll get to see what these people do every day, and...that's all.

What is so interesting about this town, you ask? It's where Twilight is set, of course! How could we not be interested in the day-to-day habits of a bunch of stupid people in a stupid town in Washington? Why didn't someone come up with this idea sooner?

Anyway, it got me thinking, why hasn't anyone done a reality show based on the lives of the residence of Alcona? Think about it, a lot of exciting things happen here. The mayor was charged with assault for swearing at a councilor without having the sense to first turn off his lapel microphone, for goodness sake! That's first class comedy!

The finale of the show could be filmed at Summerfest, in the beer tent. Of course, nobody will see it because we'll all be lined up for the porta-poties.

Seriously, why hasn't anyone done this yet? We residence of Alcona are way more interesting than a bunch of sparkly people from some nowhere town in Washington, of all places.

Scrooge?

I'm watching the old Scrooge movie with Alastair Sim, and I'm wondering what the actual title is. Starchoice says it's called A Christmas Carol, while the title on the screen said Scrooge. Meanwhile, I have this one on DVD, and the case says A Christmas Carol. I have to assume that the title that actually appeared in the film must be the correct one, but it seems odd that both Starchoice and the DVD case are wrong. Does it matter? Of course not!

I think this may be the greatest story ever told, but I also think that Scrooge has a bad reputation that he doesn't necessary deserve. That's not to say that he was a nice man, but I think the whole point can be summed up with a bit of dialogue from the beginning of the story.

When the two men collecting for the poor arrive at Scrooges place of business to ask for money, Scrooge says: "Are there no prisons? And the union workhouses, are they still in order, then?"

I don't remember the rest of the dialogue, but he indicates that he does indeed support the charities he had mentioned, and that those in need must inquire to those charities. In other words, he doesn't give money to any Joe who comes in off the street asking for it. I think that's fair.

Again, he's no saint, of course. But I don't think Charles Dickens gave us enough evidence to support the claim that Scrooge was a true bastard. I don't think anyone would claim that hard work makes a bad person. And there truly is no law that forces a person to love Christmas.

Still a great story, though.

Long Day + Sleepiness = Little Time to Write

Today I shopped for Tom, and made out well. I'm happy with my progress for the most part.

Could somebody please explain to me how a game that's older than time - namely, Mousetrap - can possibly be sold out at every store in the city? Why did every family in Central Ontario decide that it's totally essential to add this particular game to their collection this year? Twister displays are everywhere I look.

Help.

I'm watching A Christmas Story. Fra-gi-le. It must be Italian.

Fine Motor Skills

So, today the kids are home from school. It's their first official day of Christmas vacation. I have been encouraging them to spend the day playing Super Mario Brothers 3, an activity I affectionately refer to as "strengthening their fine motor skills". "Strengthening their fine motor skills" is a fantastic activity, because it also serves to "keep them out of my hair".

I left them to it all morning as I cleaned up after breakfast, did some laundry, and dabbled on the computer for a while. When I went up stairs to tell them to come down for lunch, they were already on Level 2 (remember, the level with the dancing cacti and the quicksand?).

Now, I distinctly remember that it took me months to get this far as a kid! I said to them, "How did you get this far already?" To which Sam answered, very quickly and seriously, "talent."

I guess kids nowadays learn on more complicated games, so the vintage games seem easy to them? It's kind of a shame that super graphics are needed now to sell systems and games. As kids, we were perfectly happy to play with the simple, left to right, prehistoric cartoon Mario. The simple games were fun.

I sat cross-legged on Sam's bed for most of the afternoon and played the game with them. It was a very nostalgic feeling. If the kids with me hadn't been my own, I could have imagined that I was seven years old again. playing with my sister, or the neighbours kids, or whoever. \

I think I'll bake cookies this evening. What's Christmas without cookies?

Christmas Shopping is Best Done After Dark

Tonight I finished Christmas shopping for the kids - actually, I had thought I was finished last week, but their grandmother called today and asked us to do her shopping for her because she now feels too old to leave her house, so I did some more shopping.

I went out with a goal. I was going to Wal-Mart to buy Mousetrap for Vicky, and Twister for Sam. (Picture it. The thought of Sam playing Twister is adorable, isn't it?) Wal-Mart was sold out of Mousetrap, but I managed to find the second Ice Age movie, so I did get a gift for each kid.

Sam complained the whole time we were gone. He's going through a phase where he doesn't want to leave the house - ever - and it didn't help that we have the new/old video games to keep him busy at home. We got through it, though, and while I was out I bought a couple of bargain bin DVD's (Christmas Vacation and Rain Man) and two George Orwell books (1984 and Animal Farm) for five bucks each. So now I have more books to add to the pile of books I haven't fount time to read yet. If I set a large, circular piece of wood across said pile, I'd have somewhere to set my coffee.

Anyway, we did all of this after dark, and the traffic wasn't so bad. We even managed to find a parking spot at Wal-Mart without having to walk six miles. Lesson learned.

The colour on our TV is still screwy, but Christmas Vacation is on, so I'm going to go watch it. (Yes, I bought the DVD today, but we're watching it on TV with the commercials.)

Oh, and I'm kinda sobbing because Brittany Murphy died. Not that I was a huge fan or anything, but Clueless was a great movie. I still love it.

Help! What's wrong with our TV?

Tonight I bought an old Nintendo system from an old friend. Yes, an original Nintendo, and some games too! I got Super Mario/Duck Hunt, Super Mario 3, Tetris, and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Fun times.

I brought the Nintendo home with the intention to hook it up to the living room TV, but because the TV is 6 years old, it's one of those enormously clunky ones that take up half the floorspace in the room. After about a minute of trying to move the damn thing to get behind, I gave up and decided to take the Nintendo upstairs to the sexy new 42 inch in our bedroom. Let me tell you, my old friend Mario has never looked as hot as he does on our new TV.

(Ok, I have to take a moment to rave about the TV. I love it. Seriously, I watched my Lost DVD's on it a few months ago and it looked amazing. Even more amazing than it did on the boring old downstairs TV. I was up every night until 4 AM until I'd watched the entire series.)

Anyway, I played with the Nintendo for a while as Tom watched, then we came back downstairs to make some tea. Tom turned on the living room TV to check the hockey score, and...

Of course, the colour was all effed up. Something happened when I was trying to move the damn thing. Anyone have any idea what I can do about it? I don't want to spend a fortune getting it fixed, since it's kind of dated anyway. But I also don't want to buy a new one right now.

What the Hell is Wrong With Me?

Why am I blogging, you ask? Well, here the thing; most of you know that I spent the majority of this past year writing my little heart out. I wrote two novels and about a million short stories.

Back in August I had a meeting with a successful author who saw a lot of potential in my work, and gave me some recommendations on how I could improve a novel that I was working on. I left the meeting with a clear head, and a solid plan. I was enthusiastic, and excited.

Here's what went wrong. The same week that I met with this guy, the lease on our Caravan ended, and we bought the vehicle. Technically the ownership changed hands, so we needed to have the thing certified. We took it to a guy who my Mother-in-law recommended, a guy who manages to hold the monopoly on the Sandy Cove market because he works dirt cheap. The catch is you have to wait forever, he's slow as freaking molasses.

He told us it would take about an hour for our inspection, so we crossed the street and sat at Tim Hortons while we waited. An hour later we returned to find that he had bumped us in favour of a family traveling from Quebec, who had a flat tire.

There is a point here, and I'm getting to it now.

In the end, it took this ass all day to finish the certification on our vehicle, and I missed a crucial day of work on my novel. I haven't touched the effing thing since. Why haven't I touched it since? I don't know. Do I blame the car inspector guy for my lack of interest/ability to finish my novel? Yes I do. Is it really his fault? Probably not, but I'm childish enough to blame him.

I'm not complaining. I have a lot of other things going on in my life, and I accomplished TONS in 2009, both with my writing and in other areas. However, I'd love to be able to finish the work that I have started. It seems a shame to waste it.

So, I'm going to try blogging. I'm hoping that if I push myself to write a blog every day, I'll be able to write fiction again. It's worth a try.

It doesn't really matter to me whether or not anyone decides to read it, but if anyone does, please let me know your thoughts on...well, on whatever I've written. Actually, I take that back. I want people to read it, because that would make the entire exercise much less pointless than it will be if I'm just throwing my thoughts out into cyber space. And I'd love to hear from people.

:-)